Genetic Donkeys: A Warning..

Yep, you read that right.. click the link below and know that this is a silly blog, but one which just goes to serve as a reminder to all who know me that not everything which crosses my mind is dark and ponderous..



http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-10695037


So, a few million years of evolution pass quietly by and with little warning a donkey suddenly finds itself at odds with gravity, and in a blindingly surreal few minutes (for everyone including the donkey) it finds itself airborne. This creature which in the grand scale of things is generally speaking little more than a slightly chubby, furry horse finds itself in an aerial predicament unlike almost any other of its kind before it. I’ll lay odds on it being the first time a flying donkey of any description has lived to tell the tale. In short there can’t have been many, and all this disturbs the philosopher in me..

With an undoubted stroke of advertising genius I have to pause and wonder - what have these people done? It’s true that I don’t think I’d forget seeing that in a hurry, but that’s not the point. Its ancestors have always roamed the ground, munching away without a care in the world - excepting any times when it was required to run away from something which wanted to eat it. Assuming the experience hasn’t rendered the donkey incapable of reproducing, just what might we have imparted to its genes with this? Certainly if it isn’t catatonic the donkey is in itself unlikely to forget all this in its lifetime either. It might even be able to recall to its friends what it was advertising as its life flashed before its eyes in a blur of surf and blue sky. Most worryingly, there was no discipline required on the donkey’s part to master the concepts of aerodynamics, propulsion or how to land.. Without warning it was thrust into a new environment and given an experience way, way ahead of its time and much, much sooner than it should have happened – assuming they had a destiny in the say in the first place. What lies in store for the future of “donkeydom”? Will the idea of air travel now take hold in its descendants, seeping into their awareness little by little.. bit by bit.. a little base pair tweak here and there, until one day..


and for what?! An advertisement for a beach.


What exactly were they trying to say anyway? “Come to our beach – WE have flying donkeys!“? A tad obvious perhaps. Maybe, “Come to our beach – the surrounding grass is really lush and uneaten”? Probably very true but no, it doesn’t seem right somehow. Perhaps “Come to our beach – your drink won’t be consumed by stray donkeys because we’ve put them all out of reach of your beer – and THAT’s a guarantee!”? I’m not on the whole too sure..

It gets worse.. What about the birds? What would they make of this mercurial burro as it soared clumsily, “eee-oar”ing its way through the stratosphere in a fashion which must have had them either drawing up battle plans or holding their breath in fear of further intoxication?

All in all I’m just saying that they might have thought it through a little deeper, but I’m not an advertising expert so I suppose I’ll leave it all to those who know better. I do have to admit I can’t think of anything more revolting than trying to share a warming, sun-kissed beach with a pack of donkeys staggering around, acting rowdy, chewing on your beach towel or sunshade and vomiting all over your sun lounger. Maybe they did the wrong thing for the right reasons? Until next time..

Peace

You Have To Laugh I Suppose.. *^^*..

Here we go again – I’ve been crippled by shyness, experienced the reduction of romance like a fine sauce by the passage of time, been dumped in a country of 91.9 million strangers 7,000 miles from home, and now as if all that wasn’t enough I’m put in the position of having to bottle up my feelings for a certain somebody, who has become very special to me of late. At this point I admit I wouldn't mind knowing just how many permutations I’m going to have to go through in my life before ‘Miss Right’ appears. I know, I know.. but let me reiterate that this is not a whinge (well, it's a little therapeutic) but rather a continuing catalogue of life as it goes, blow by blow, for the benefit of anyone reading - and believe me it certainly does blow.

I keep getting the feeling that if I'm lucky enough to get to read this back years from now my life will probably appear to me as a warning to others on how NOT to play it, rather than a resume of success. If anyone reading is wondering how to deal with unrequited feelings, my first bit of advice is reconcile those feelings - as quickly as you possibly can. Having experienced a few heartbreaking variations on a theme I can say that this is probably the cruellest out there.. and yes, without some effort on your part the hardest day will be the day when she finds her ‘Mr Right’ - but I will also be happy for her.. and so should you.

That’s lesson number two.

Remember always that if you really care then know that she deserves her happiness too, simple as.. Don’t blame her for her lack of mutual feelings. As has been discussed if that spark is missing then that’s just the way it is. Retain your honour in the face of circumstantial defeat! If any doubt remains just bear a little role reversal in mind. Rejection is hard, but I would say there’s nothing wrong with feeling the way you will likely feel – grieving through any kind of emotional difficulty or loss is okay, just don’t dwell on it for too long. Believe in the future. Listen to me.. I’m beginning to sound like a pro (you’d never believe it really).

I think we will always have a good friendship whatever the circumstances but it has to be said that letting go of the regular companionship, as with all friendships which move on, will be hard. Oh, and if that certain someone is reading this.. then for the record I want you to know that when your day does come I will be so happy.. and I will miss you so much :)