How Far Will You Go? The Adventures Of A Long Distance Relationship

As I write this I can only admit to roughly six months of exposure to my long distance relationship, or LDR as it’s known to the more routinely adventurous amongst us. Whilst I would hesitate to recommend it as a path to nirvana for either the faint-hearted, naturally nervous or anyone recently diagnosed with heart problems, I have to say that on the whole it makes for a fascinatingly enriching experience. I can only speak for myself of course, but I can tell you that it brings with it a whole new respect for the meaning of the word ‘patience’.

I met a most delightful young lady through a popular social networking site - as likely a place as anywhere for an encounter in the 21st century social scene. Even as little as a few years ago such a meeting would have been an unlikely event - more so for myself as I didn’t actually go looking for her. My plan was foolproof – to stretch the possibilities of said social networking site to make friends around the world, friends I might even meet with one day should I happen to venture in their direction. I've never equated friends with risk, but as an analysis of the situaition it looked pretty good - a minimum initial investment (saying a random ‘hello’ by email) with a potentially big return (lots of new and exotic friends in far flung places).  If I’d actually sought international romance I suppose the universal line of least resistance would have guided me to one of the many dating sites to be found online. I expect many users can testify to their ‘effectiveness’, whether it resulted in a life-long loving relationship with their dream girl/boy, or insurmountable and accelerating financial debt, eternal servitude to the bank of their choice and possible decades of crippling emotional instability. Ironically the LDR seems to somehow seamlessly fuse these disparate conclusions.

I’m sure some of you out there must have had days when leaving the arms of your loved one for work/do some shopping/walk the dog was a test in itself, much less having to wait six months for your first real meeting, whilst your future girlfriend contends with the daily challenges which medical training, volcanoes, earthquakes and tsunami warnings bring.  The costs of travelling too can also be something which demands a certain respect, as you witness your once clean sheet of debt-free existence float off into the distance on life’s ocean, lashed to a mental raft of mystery and fluctuating interest rates. Yet the compulsion to find a lasting love has spurred many a man forwards since the beginning of time.  Whether it be like the good old days of rescuing a princess from the clutches of a powerful and raving megalomaniac (hell-bent on dominating both his place of work AND the target of your affections), or a more civilised and tranquil romantic encounter with that special someone, it all boils down to companionship and that person it would seem may not necessarily be just the girl next door anymore.  My case is a pefect example of the truly absurd - a woman on the other side of the planet, dropped into my life with the clockwork precision of a god with a sense of humour and time on its hands..

I admit to being very optimistic about our little coming adventure in spite of the odds, though as with all things in life where it will actually lead is anyone’s guess - the asylum, or an emotionally secure future of prosperity and eternal life for all?  It seems that in this case 'time' will have the last word.

Peace!

THE FIRST ONE – Why?

Hi there!  Welcome to this, my first blog on the "Life In The Shell" site.  I thought for my first entry I would try to define it's raison d'etre.  As life moves inexorably forwards, and I accumulate all manner of stresses and strains, I felt I needed something to help me exercise and relax both mind and spirit in equal measure..  Somewhere to share my philosophical musings or draw attention to articles of interest - maybe even spark debate in these stale times in which we live (ladies and gentlemen, watch very carefully over the coming years as I demonstrate to you how to 'eat your own words' in the public domain..).  Anyway just to be clear, member's contributions aside, these musings are mine alone (unless I state otherwise), and any harm, discomfort or destruction caused to anyone or anything in the process is completely unintentional (unless I state otherwise).

Tenzin Gyatso (a.k.a the Dalai Lama) has stated many a little gem of wisdom in all his lifetimes, but the one I read and admired most recently is his fervent belief that the true natural state of humanity is compassion, and not hatred, as one might otherwise be lead to believe..

“We humans have existed in our present form for about a hundred thousand years. I believe that if during this time the human mind had been primarily controlled by anger and hatred, our overall population would have decreased. But today, despite all our wars, we find that the human population is greater than ever. This clearly indicates to me that love and compassion predominate in the world. And this is why unpleasant events are "news"; compassionate activities are so much a part of daily life that they are taken for granted and , therefore, largely ignored”.

So, in the best traditions of human behaviour when it's back is up against the wall, let’s work cooperatively and compassionately towards resolving some of life’s little dilemmas, have a little fun along the way, and try our best to be mature(ish) in leaving no stone unturned! There may even be the occasional flash of wit and/or humour..

As the Dalai Lama is also quoted as having once said..“people are too serious.. all the time, too serious”.

Peace!